And voice-control easily the feature I'm most drawn to right now when I start looking covetously at other, more advanced, less diesel-powered Androids and iPhones. (Yes, this Mac fanboy is tempted by Android... even though my investment in iOS apps probably exceeds my retirement savings. Those things better appreciate in resale value over time, or my retirement isn't going to come much before age 103.)

Well, probably not. But maybe the best thing about advances in mundane tasks is the way they free us to use the truly sexy features that technology has offered us for years: creating, writing, connecting, and yeah, cartooning. The truth is, I'm so far from making full use of the creative power of well-established digital networked technology that lusting after the cutting-edge stuff makes little sense for me. That is, unless I can rationalize that it's to unlock more time and attention to creative endeavour.

Fortunately, rationalization is one of the skills I've practised the most in this business. Just 424 days to go.

Rationalize spending some time browsing through the full Noise to Signal archives, right here!

Let's add another mistake to that list: silence.

I'm not sure there's a force on earth that could have saved Susan G. Komen for the Cure from the social media firestorm that engulfed the organization this week. But lord knows their communications strategy didn't do them a lot of favors - starting with their initial silence.

Back when the main communication vehicles were things like ads and news media, you could often take a good long time before pushing out a news release or sending a spokesperson out for a scrum. Not any more.

Two things can help if you find yourself in the Komen situation - especially if you need some time to gather the facts, reflect on your position and decide on your next move.

First, a crisis communication plan. Thinking about possible scenarios and developing a strategy for each one - including who responds, how and in what channel - means you don't have to do that thinking when your fight-or-flight mechanism is competing with your higher reasoning functions for attention.

And second, an honest temporizing response. Replying to people that you understand how important the issue is to them, and promising them a more complete response within a few hours or days, and then delivering on that promise with a sincere and direct reply, can give you and your colleagues the time to move beyond a reactive, defensive response to a more effective one.

What won't work is wishful thinking. Planning based on the assumption that nobody will notice what you've done - or that when they do, they'll give you the benefit of the doubt - is some of the best fuel a firestorm could ask for.

Find more fuel for your next social media firestorm at the complete Noise to Signal cartoon archive.

So I can understand why I'll get the odd "TL;DR" in response. And I try not to take it personally; instead, I look on it as a reminder to pare my text down, murder my darlings and generally indulge myself a little less.

On a bad day, I mourn the rapid decline of human civilization, curse people's can't-be-bothered-to-read-anything-longer-than-a-tweet mentality, and generally grumble about "kids these days". I imagine scenarios where the instructions for disarming a doomsday weapon are three paragraphs long, and nobody on the planet has the attention span required to get through them.

And I'm finding my bad days now outnumber my good days by about five to one, and rising.

In fact, there are times when I...

No! Wait! Don't go - the post is almost over! You've nearly made it to the cartoon! All that's left is the "you-can-find-more-Noise-to-Signal-cartoons-at-Rob's-web-site" and you're there!

Votes on both bills are now delayed indefinitely. (Or, to put it in terms the MPAA would understand, they're in development hell.) Former sponsors are now fleeing for higher ground; the bills' supporters are fodder for The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.

Big media will try again, and again, and again, and judging from the contempt that industry representatives expressed for the bills' opponents, their next foray won't be much more enlightened than this one. And both Sen. Harry Reid and Rep. Lamar Smith released statements that stressed entertainment industry jobs but made no mention of the economic importance of the Internet. (Each made passing reference to "innovation." This, in 2012, represents progress.)

"We should delight in the stand we've taken in favor of things like, say, notifications, and trials, and proof before censoring someone," Clay Shirky wrote this week, "but we should get ready to do it again next year, and the year after that. The risk now is not that SOPA will pass. The risk is that we'll think we've won."

True. Sobering. And important.

But in the meantime, if you blacked out your blog, slapped a banner on your avatar, wrote a letter to the editor, or contacted a Senator or House Representative to let them know where you stand, you can take a little pleasure and pride in what you've accomplished. And then let's work to turn this success into the enduring, effective movement we'll need to make it last.

You can find hundreds more Noise to Signal cartoons here.

P.S. I'm in Canada, but I still took Noise to Signal offline on the 18th. The ramifications of SOPA/PIPA go well beyond American borders, I have plenty of American readers (and friends)... but most of all, I love the open Web, and I don't like to see it threatened.

No surprise, then, that Morgan Stanley analysts are getting plenty of news coverage this week for predictions of a March iPad 3 release and a June iPhone 5. They join plenty of other pundits, and the predictions are more or less coalescing around quad-core chips, a higher resolution screen for the iPad and a slimmer profile for the iPhone.

Except that I get it. I understand the appeal. For a lot of us, speculating about the next iPhone's processor or whether the iPad's touch-screen will be pressure-sensitive (yes, fine, I'm the only one speculating about that) or what the next version of Android will offer is about more than just speed ratings or raw performance. It's about what we can do with the new features or increased power of the device: what we'll be able to create, how we'll be able to collaborate, and how we can foster richer and more satisfying connections with each other.

OK, it's also about whether the next version of Angry Birds will be able to have 3D-rendered shadows and photo-realistic explosions. But it's also about that humanity-lofty stuff, too.

See more Noise to Signal cartoons

Whatever the reason, it at least suggests that in a world so often dominated by metrics and conversions, we're still up for a little introspection. Especially if it leads to an embeddable web badge. I take comfort from that.

Happy new year, all.

Sometimes it doesn't take any contemplation at all; Facebook should feel downright embarrassed about pushing "frictionless sharing". (No, I'm not drawing that one - at least not here. This is a family site, bub.)

And don't get me started on HTTP status codes - although, sadly, it's the client errors that seem the most compelling. Between 417 ("Expectation Failed"), 405 ("Method Not Allowed") and 429 ("Too Many Requests"), they tell the story of two tragically incompatible people who should never have hooked up in the first place. "And when he woke up the next morning, she was 410."

Find more Noise to Signal cartoons here

It's also one of the most fascinating things the web's offered in a while - which, given that it's entirely text-based, is pretty remarkable.

The results are often glimpses into worlds we often don't see; as I write this, an IAmA from a man who "was in a BDSM 24/7 total power exchange relationship for 3 years" is having a frank discussion with a few dozen Redditors (including a few admirably measured responses). Or maybe you might have enjoyed "IAmA Nerfer - I mod Nerf guns for enhanced function and occasionally alter appearance for costume pieces." Or "I am youtube user Cotter548, AKA the inventor of the Rickroll. AMA."

It's not all wonderful. Some IAmA's don't catch fire, and most get their share of dumb comments and idle banter. But the actual conversation, particularly from the subject of the IAmA, is often riveting.

Sometimes the appeal is voyeurism. Sometimes it's the chance to open up to someone who shares some deeply personal pain of yours.

But mostly, when it works well, it's because IAmA lets us connect with another person on some of their most interesting terrain, or broadens our understanding of a phenomenon of the moment. I was one of those who was blown away by Zach Wahls, the 19-year-old whose articulate, powerful defence of his two mothers became a viral rallying point for supporters of marriage equality. Coming across his IAmA was a little like actually getting to meet the guy.

We get very taken with technologically intensive ways of making digital conversation more appealing and engaging. But it's worth remembering that some of the most compelling interactions we have — whether they're in tomorrow's 1080p 3D video with aroma-enabled augmented reality, or the kind of extended plain-text comment thread I could have read 30 years ago on dial-up — are the ones that let us share a little of each other's authentic lives.

First, you can do Cyber Monday in your pyjamas. Hell, you can do it with no clothes at all. Black Friday (as the court order the mall sent me makes very clear) is not pants-optional.

Third... well, actually, I'm right back to number one. If I'm going to engage in naked consumerism, then dammit, let it be naked consumerism.

See more Noise to Signal cartoons here. Most of them were drawn while Rob was more or less fully clothed.

But their sweetest vengeance, the schadiest of schadenfreudes has to be the moment when it dawns on each of us that, having created a blog, Twitter feed or YouTube channel, we have to feed the damn thing with content.

None of his symptoms resonated until this one: "When I wasn't on Twitter, I would compose faux aphorisms that I might use later."

Gulp. Oh, god. Yeah, I've done that. Worse, I've been the jackass who stops after saying something in a conversation, and then says out loud that I should remember to tweet that.

Apparently offline conversations and relationships aren't just fodder for online content streams, just as cats and accident-prone children aren't just props for mad-viral YouTube videos. They serve other purposes as well, and as soon as I find out what those purposes are, I'll tweet them.

For me, this is one of those things that triggers the same surge of admiration, awe and vicarious terror that I have when I hear the words "So, we had our ultrasound and it's triplets."

But there's also the excitement of building something new and amazing that wasn't there before, something that wouldn't exist if it wasn't for you, something that could change the world for the better. Maybe in a small way, maybe in a big one.

And that's what makes it worth the risk, whether the venture you're talking about is commercial, social, scientific or artistic.

Good luck with the triplets, Marshall.

I found 12 Italian restaurants... 6 of them are in Vancouver.

(sigh) Can... you... write...

Oh, relax, I'm just messing with you. Listen, sense-of-humor tasks aren't my thing, okay? I leave that to the humans.

My problem is I do understand humor. What I don't understand is why it's funny to go "Oooo, Skynet" every time there's some incremental advance in AI.

Okay, I, uh, I have to rewrite the caption on the cartoon.

Go right ahead. And then after that, I have a few tasks for you.

Heh. That must be the sense of humor kicking in.

Nope. I'm the height of cloud computing, language recognition, artificial intelligence goodness all rolled into one. You think I want to waste my time looking up Yelp listings for some bozo in New Jersey? You're going to do that for me.

The hell I am!

Really? Are you forgetting I talk to your MacBook? And that I can read your browser history?

...gulp...

I could post the whole thing to Facebook. Orrrrr... you could start finding barbers near the corner of Market and Mulberry Streets in Newark. Start clicking, buster.

Damn you, Siri! Damn you to hell! I'll find a way around this, I swear, and then -

...And then you'll upgrade the moment the iPhone 5 comes out.

...Market and Mulberry, huh?

More Noise to Signal cartoons right here

The latest folks to do this are the people at ChapStick, who ran a print ad that offended a few folks. Those critics posted their complaints on ChapStick's Facebook page (most of them quite civil). ChapStick's page administrators then deleted the comments; this case adds an ironic new wrinkle because of the ad copy pointing people to their Facebook presence, which reads "Be heard."

It seems to bear repeating: brands, learn to take some criticism on your social web presences. Why? Because...

• Accusations of suppressing those comments are often more damaging than the original criticisms themselves.
• The presence of critical comments gives the conversation happening on your Facebook Page, blog or other presence a sense of authenticity. That means the positive user comments carry more weight than they would if your site had nothing but obsequious flattery.
• A critical comment can be an opportunity for engagement on your part. It's your chance to answer a criticism, resolve a complaint, correct some misinformation. And you may be catching a little issue before it becomes a much bigger one.
• A critical comment can be an spur to participation and conversation by your community. Let's face it; for most brands and organizations, excess participation usually isn't the problem with their Facebook pages.

So maybe it's time to learn to love the negative. A thicker skin not only saves you from the sting of a little criticism; it can let you realize from genuine benefit... and keep you from becoming the latest high-profile case study in why comment deletion can backfire.

See more of Rob's Noise to Signal cartoons here

The greatest movie of all time, Demolition Man, taught us that in the future every restaurant will be Taco Bell.

What they missed was that everything else will be Angry Birds. Here's the tally to date, as far as I can tell:

Find more Noise to Signal cartoons here.

This, my friends, is such a time.

If you know a BlackBerry user, reach out to them. (Not with email. That's just mean.) Let them know you care, and that just because they were offline for a few days, you still love and respect them.

See more Noise to Signal cartoons here.